15.5.2014

15.5.2014

3:41 p.m.

Hey.

It’s been nearly a month since I last wrote here. Miss me?

Things haven’t been good. It’s the end of a whole school year, but I don’t feel it. No, I don’t feel the unsettled and sad feeling like I used to when I didn’t want to say goodbye. Maybe this year hasn’t given me much to cherish, or maybe it’s not the right time yet. I guess I’m still looking for something special, something desired, something peculiar.

I am procrastinating. I’ve always been procrastinating. It’s part of my life, and it’s the part that should be changed as soon as possible, yet it’s also the hardest one. Everyone procrastinates sometimes in their life, but it will never be enough. That feeling, that not-want-to-do-anything feeling is so tempted and people with no determined head like me will most likely surrender.

I know that.

But I still don’t want to change.

If asked why, I’ll probably say that there won’t be any time like this for me. Life is still twisting and challenging me with its own fkn method, and moments of relaxation are so rare and precious and I always want to get hold of them and never let them go. Time for school, friends, and family is gradually being lost, and yet I’m delaying everything because I wanna keep it long.

It’s the ironic thing of life.

My life.